In every human being, there lives a monster. A monster so big, so green, so hideous - but sometimes you just can't see it. Once in a while it will come out of its hiding place - only to be seen for a short while. But sometimes, the monster feels so bold and brave that it lingers around long enough to be seen not only by its master, but also by people around.
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This is how my aura should've looked today...I was burning GREEN with envy.
Today my green-eyed monster came out from its hiding place. It was so fierce and so empowering, that I couldn't mask my facial expression with my fake smiles anymore. I was surprised at how jealous I could be - I've never felt that jealous before. I've felt "boiling with anger" before, but not "boiling with envy". Unnecessary waste of energy and mind power.
Why should I be jealous? I myself couldn't explain it. I got to know that friend A got something that - well, it was not something that I've ever wanted before, or something that friend A did not deserve to get or something like that. Friend A was equally shocked to get that thing (I think) and friend A was more than deserving to receive it. But - I WAS JEALOUS. Jealous of friend A. Which was dumb! I knew it was dumb to be jealous, but I just can't stop feeling that!
How I wished Pandora didn't open that stupid box. Envy and Jealousy must be in there somewhere. Thanks a lot, Pandora!
I really need to put a leash on my green-eyed monster. I don't want people start calling me the Jealous Bitch. It seems that this week is filled with negative emotions - recently the urge to kill, now jealousy and envy? What's next? Rage? Hopefully not.
Thanks to a few bars of chocolate - I managed to get some happy hormones to circulate in my circuits. I hope I won't be attacked by such negative energy again of such magnitude in the near future. I'm afraid of wrinkles. Sigh.
jealous of what wor? tell me maxxxiee. =)
ReplyDeletenothing lah joey - just feeling jealous thats all. very childish reason haha.
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